Saturday, June 17, 2006

It's not that I'm not a patriot...

I mean, for goodness' sake...I fought for our country! I've spent the past 18 years of my life as a serviceman for the good ol' USA.

But my friends are treating me like a pariah for not being a slobbering, rabid fan of the USA in the 2006 World Cup.

Truth be told, I don't think the USA should have gone to the World Cup...and I really hope they DON'T win! Which, judging by their performance against the Czech Republic, doesn't seem to be a real concern.

You may ask WHY I would not support the USA in the World Cup?

Well...first of all, the USA is the ONLY country in the world who doesn't seem to know what the sport is CALLED! No...we call it 'soccer'. We're the only country in the world that doesn't seem to know that the name of the sport is FOOTBALL (or Futbol, or some other variant), BECAUSE YOU USE YOUR FUCKING FEET!!!!!

No...we use the name "Football" for a completely DIFFERENT sport where only ONE guy ever uses his feet...and guess what? Most of the time, that guy is recruited from a FOOTBALL team from somewhere else in the world. The sport WE call 'football' is actually more like RUGBY, but it's Rugby with a bunch of superflous lame-arsed rules and pads.

Secondly... what if we won? You know, the rest of the world already hates us. Americans are treated like crap in every other country in the world. If you travel to Europe, you better claim to be Canadian, or the waiters will spit in your soup when you're not looking. If we WON the World Cup? We wouldn't get a moment's peace. We wouldn't be able to travel outside the US without catching crap everywhere we go.

Combine those two reasons with the fact that the general attitude of Americans seems to be, "Yeah, if the US wins the World Cup, we're gonna start making everyone else call it 'soccer'."

WHAT?

Hey guys...it's that sort of arrogant, screw-the-rest-of-the-world attitude that makes everyone else HATE US!!!! So, yeah, we're the strongest, but we're also the youngest. A little bit of RESPECT for the rest of the world would be in order perhaps? They HAVE been doing this longer, for goodness sake.

That's why I don't fully support the US in the World Cup this year...because we have yet to earn the respect of the rest of the world in a GREAT MANY AREAS, this being one of them. When we can learn to play nice with other kids, then maybe we deserve to be in the league.

Like I said...I'm a patriot. Heck, I bet I'm more patriotic than most folks reading this right now. I never fail to stand for the National Anthem, and I remain at attention until the last note is played...tears rolling down my cheeks. I love my country more than anything in the world. It is my pure love for the US that allows me to see her flaws with clarity, and love her DESPITE them, while at the same time, hoping to do my part to help her OVERCOME them.

Thank you and goodnight.

P.S. -- at the time of this posting, I'm seated on my couch in front of the TV getting ready to cheer for the US in their match against Italy.

2 Comments:

Blogger hana'li said...

i would have pulled for the US in "soccer" if i had payed attention, just b/c i think its great that a team from US actually could compete in a sport we have really no clue how to play correctly...that aside, i dont really pay attention to most sports except when my friend claire rants about England in some sport...as in, Football exists to support marching band, Basketball to support Pep Band, and hockey so canadians can stop looking like pansies...
oh, like your site, didnt expect a lot of that from you, so sorry i underestimated you so badly...deepest apologies...

July 10, 2006 10:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Excellent, love it!
» » »

July 26, 2006 7:18 PM  

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